FRIENDS outside of family. . . . TRAITS of a Father...."You can never have too many friends."

My Daddy was quick whetted and never knew a stranger. I've been told that I take after him (which totally true or not is a great compliment to me).  He told me "You never can have too many friends."  Another one of his sayings to me was "Everybody that know's you loves you."  Well, when I was middle school age I came home from school and told my Daddy that that saying of his wasn't true that there were some girls in my class that didn't like me.  He quickly came back with "Then you'll just have to give them the chance to really get to know the real you and they'll change their minds." Those sayings along with his three squeezes to my knee, which meant "I love you" were traits of a Father that I have truly grown up loving about my Daddy, Israel Ard Hoyt.  There are people in my life that I've felt blessed to call my friends since my early childhood.  Some friendships were developed once I started school and some came along when we vacationed or changed neighborhoods or Church locations.  Jim, also has friends from his youth, some of which are mine as well since he and I have known each other since we were three years old.  Some friendships developed in the Wards and Callings we've had thru the years:


John Nicholas Udall, Jr. Rodrick Clelland, & my brother Timothy Ard Hoyt - all 3 livelong friends.

 
The seven children of Dora & Joe Dana: top: Judy, Kathleen, Susan, Marilyn
bottom row:  Carol, Reed & Kent

   
The women in my Ward (it started out plus one from Tempe so we wouldn't be accused of belonging to a click) JaNae and Darlene don't get together with us much any more but there's still Karly, Chris, LoAnn, Judy and Charlie and me.  We use to call ourselves twenty some odd years ago "The Beach Babes" now there's not a name for what we've become, but "Eternal Friends" fits nicely.  Thru it all we've stayed close and enjoy sharing our lives and that of our families with each other.

  
Kerry Doyle & her hubby Kenny Driggs.  Jim and I have known Kerry since our Third Ward early childhood days.  Later Kenny became our friend when we got to know him at the "Y".


 
This special couple we got to know when we moved into our home on Black Hill.  He was our Bishop, and former Brazilian Miassionary.  He extended us our call to serve as a Senior Couples Missionaries.  We lived again in his Ward when we returned for a year and he was in our Stake Presidency then.  His wife and he were also close to Neph and Marge as they were in a Ward together before it split and became West Wing Ward of the North Peoria Arizona Stake.  Scott and Ellie Pace.


  
My good friend and former VT companion (and we visited in this car and had a blast) Judy Boyd.  The Chuck & Judy Ogden Family we met when we first moved out to Paradise Valley and they lived one street over.  Our children were friends with their children; Brett, Megan, Bree, Alisa, JC & Todd.

  
Silvio (my Brazilian son), Tobias (our CES Leader) & Mattas (my language trainer at the "Y") with their wives. Preparing for our Mission & while on our Mission.   
Judy Dana Eagleston Rassmussen, Carol Dana Rose Baugh & hubby Glenn. Childhood friends.  My dear friend Shirley Brown Weenig's family after she passed away from cancer. (They named their eldest daughter Shirlyn after me.)   My girlfriends in highschool Lana Gorman, Cheryl Strickland, LoWanda Slade, Linda Simmons, Beverly Sue Christensen, Nancy Gibson, Judy Hubbard, Mary Ada Thomas, & my cousin Floreen Hatch; Then my college girlfriends, Kerry Doyle, Shirley Brown (nor pictured:  Phyllis Hansen, who became my brother Tim's wife)  All of which I still can call my "Eternal Friends".

PETS....grew up with them or had hardly any

I grew up with pets, indoors & out type.  We had dogs, parakeets, cats, goldfish, 2 horses (Gib & Charlie).  Jim had at least one dog that we have a picture to document and I know Steve (I think) had a parakeet.  Our kids grew up with dogs, cockatoos, parakeets, tortoises, parrots, gerbils, goldfish and one snake (for a Scout Merit Badge project only).  We feel that kids need pets, they help teach them responsibility and help in their socialization skills.  Pets fill a void when children are feeling out of sorts and want to vent safely!  Our "Grand's" enjoy their pets and even some pets that they just have while on vacations but then have to leave them behind:

   

       

WHITE SHIRTS and SCOUT SHIRTS speak volumes.about a man. . . . worthwhile commitments.

               I love my men in their white shirts at church. I wanted the Sabbath Day to feel different and special to them.  Special enough to wear clothing different than they wear ever other day of the week.  To me it shows respect for themselves and the callings or future callings they hope to be worthy to serve.  In order to not have this become an issue as my boys grew up I made sure that a nice, crisp white shirt was always clean and ironed and set out for them each Sunday morning.  They were not free to choose where this dress code was concerned. I know this is not a commandment like "thou shalt not wear any other color" it is just a "mother thing" that I feel strongly about.

 
 For a young boy to commit to achieving the rank of Eagle Scout and then sticking to that commitment and he becomes an Eagle shows me that he can achieve anything he desires that is worthwhile in life.  All my boys worked hard and achieved this goal and I KNOW their sons, my precious "Grand's"  can do it as well. 



(More pictures to come when I get them on my computer out of my scrapbooks for each of my sons.)

CHRISTMAS...we had to learn somethings the hard way. . .

        
When our children were small on Christmas Morning, they'd come in to wake us up (as if we were asleep and as if we didn't know they had already peeked to see what Santa had brought) and then run into the family room and start digging into their Christmas.  With so many throwing their wrappings into the fireplace we had to start a few new Allen Family Traditions on the fly and in a hurry.  First from that Christmas forward they had to all line up according to age (tallest at the back) out in the hallway by our bedroom so that their Daddy and I could go out into the family room, set up our camera equipment, light the tree and start a fire (our first fireplace, other than the cabin, was in our home on 33rd Place).  Well the fire in the fire place went away after that Christmas because having so many throw their wrappings into the fireplace made the fire go nearly out of control and bellow out into the family room. (Thus a big black plastic bag was furnished for them to stuff their wrapping paper into.) Then came the fact that I was raised to write "Thank You's" for gifts received.  With the way they were unwrapping their gifts the tags got lost in the shuffel. (Thus I had them run and give me the tag and show everybody what the gift was they'd opened and I'd write on the back of the tag what they'd received from the gift giver as they were thanking them in person if it was from one of us in the room.  Later on I'd give them their tags and a package of "Thank You" notes, that I'd placed in each of their Christmas Stockings, with notice that they were to write their "Thank You's " before New Year's Eve and that I would help those that needed help.)  The only way that the gifts could be identified as to who's was who's was for one of "Santa's Helper's" to hand out the gifts and all would take turns opening a gift and doing the tag thing for me and then it was the next ones turn.  When we were still doing this when our oldest came home from college one Christmas she said, "Momma, I've learned that your behavior is called 'compulsive obsessive' (and to think we were paying for her to label me as such after only four months of being away at college - you've heard the saying - a little bit of knowledge can be deadly).  Well, compulsive obsessive or whatever it kept our house from burning down and made things easier to give thanks for gifts received and gave me peace of mind (so be it).  When our children were little, helping them get gifts for each other and their cousin's they drew and their grandparent's was often hard.  Some times they'd make some of their gifts, but oft times not.  In fact one Christmas they all wanted to pull their meager savings together and get a nice gift for their Daddy.  I was very pregnant, due December 29th (so you know just how pregnant I was).  Anyway we all got into the car and went to the mall.  We were standing around the mall directory looking for a store we could go get their Daddy's gift from when a young couple came up to us and said, "Haven't you heard of planned parenthood?"  I was so shocked and hurt that I gathered up the kids and headed back out to the car trying not to cry in my rush, but breaking down when we were all buckled in.  They gave their Daddy an earfull when he arrived home from work that night, and he said to me, "Well Sweetheart, if ever someone says that to you again you just say to them, "Yes, and we're half way thru our plan."  (It did happen to me one more time but I wasn't able to get a word in before the man was out of range and I was in line at the grocery check-out stand anyway.)  
I started "The Allen Mercantile Store".  (Named after Jim's grandfather's store in Canada.)  I had the kids all write down 10 idea's of what they'd like for Christmas and telling them they might not get any but "Santa" could always use a little help.  Then I'd look thru catalogue's and purchase some of the items along with all alike p.j.s so they'd look good for their Christmas morning pictures. I'd wrap up their p.j.'s for them to open the night before Christmas so they could wear them to bed.   I'd lay out six items per child on our king sized bed and put very generous prices on the items.  Then I'd remove the items for the child that was currently shopping and he/she would pick one item out of each child's stack which I'd pinned or taped their name on each item.  They'd pay me for the gifts, I'd give them some bows, tape and their very own tags, pen, wrapping paper and send them out into a private area in the house to wrap up their gifts and put them under the tree.  Then I'd call in the next child, after putting his items out of sight and putting the person who'd just been doing their shopping with me back out onto the bed.  When the last child did his shopping, they were the youngest so didn't care that there wasn't much left to pick from they were just happy to be going thru the process and I helped that last one wrap his/her gifts up for the other's and place under the tree.  This worked for several year's.

 

(More pictures to come when I put them on my computer.)
  

"RUBA-DUB-DUB" Grammy loves her babies in the tub. . . .

 Nothing like my children and "Grand's" at tubby time (cute, cute babies bottoms have always been my weakness)! I love the look of my daughter's and daughters-in-law when they are expecting these precious spirits as well (do you think those feelings are connected?  I wonder!).  I missed out on a few of these events and so I treasure the pictures sent to me in Brasil:

   
     
(More pictures to come when I get them out of my scrapbooks and into my computer iphoto.)